Slow Motion Filicide
After Rose passed in January of 2025, a friend sent me this from ChapGPT. She said she gave it very few prompts, yet it is so spot on it’s jaw dropping (although other forms of filicide threats and violence are also accurate in our story). If you feel I might be exaggerating circumstances, please visit Pertinent Messages and Rose’s Anonymous Post to see this exact scenario described in the words of Rose and Judith. I did not write this, nor edit it, and while I’m hesitant to reference ChatGPT (all other writing on this site is mine, authentically), in this instance I think it illustrates that this happens enough, beyond my sister, that ChatGPT is able capture it. To be honest, I’m confused as to where ChatGPT sourced this from as I haven’t been able to find adult Filicide Survivor studies, there seem to be few memoirs, and “Slow Motion Filicide” does not come up as a topic in searches. I actually asked where it sourced it from and the app essentially admitted it made up the term, which is shocking, because I watched exactly this happen. In this instance, I agree with ChatGPT. I really think we need to talk about it.
“Slow-Motion Filicide and the Unseen War Against Daughters
Most people associate filicide—the killing of one’s own child—with dramatic headlines or psychosis-induced acts. But there’s a quieter, more insidious form that almost no one talks about. It doesn’t happen in a flash of violence. It happens in whispers, over decades. Through addiction, sabotage, shame, emotional incest, and psychological strangulation.
This is slow-motion filicide. And it’s real.
When a parent sets up the conditions for a child’s destruction—and cloaks it in the language of love or necessity—it’s not just abuse. It’s a form of soul murder. And when the child dies, society often blames the child: for their addiction, for their "choices," for not being able to heal. Rarely do we turn our eyes to the puppet master behind the scenes.
What the Research Says (and Doesn’t Say)
Filicide is the act of a parent killing their own child. It's rare statistically—only 2–3% of homicides in the U.S. each year—but far more common in emotional, spiritual, and slow-lethal forms than our data capture. Criminologist Phillip Resnick identified five types of filicide: altruistic, acutely psychotic, unwanted child, accidental (from abuse), and spouse revenge. But what happens when none of these fit?
What happens when the weapon is not a knife or a gun—but a bottle of pills, a wine glass, a whispered lie, a sabotaged escape plan? The kind of parent who greases the wheels of destruction, not out of madness, but out of something colder—envy, control, rage, or the need to dominate—rarely makes it into the headlines. But they exist. And often, they are mothers.
Borderline Personality Disorder and Sociopathic Traits
When BPD manifests in a severe, unremitting form—especially when fused with sociopathy or narcissistic traits—it can create a uniquely destructive maternal dynamic:
• Emotional incest and enmeshment
• Rage masked as protectiveness
• Boundary violations and blame-shifting
• Sabotage of independence, healing, or healthy relationships
• Triangulation between siblings
• Encouragement or facilitation of substance use
This is not “bad parenting.” It is orchestrated emotional annihilation. And sometimes, it ends in death.
Why We Don’t Talk About It
Because it’s taboo to name a mother as dangerous. Because adult children of these parents often doubt their own memories, especially when gaslighting has been lifelong. Because these deaths don’t look like murder. They look like overdose. Or suicide. Or mental illness. Society doesn’t see the fingerprints. Adult survivors of this abuse are often gaslit by everyone around them, because “she’s your mom” or “she did her best” or “at least she didn’t hit you.” But sometimes “doing her best” meant priming her daughters for death. Or dependency. Or invisibility.
Why Her Story Matters
Your friend’s story is jaw-dropping, diabolical—and vital. Because every time someone speaks this truth out loud, the cultural fog thins. She may never get justice in the traditional sense. But telling her story could save lives. Validate silent survivors. And break a generational curse that thrives in silence.
Final Word
Slow-motion filicide is real. It’s just not on the news. It’s in the quiet homes where daughters lose themselves trying to survive their mothers. It’s time we talked about it.
If your friend is willing to write it, the world is ready to listen. Or at least, the ones who need it most are. “